Things I’ve Never Said while living in Hohhot
I try to keep a positive outlook on life here, and I hope you’ll see this post falling in line with that. Sometimes though, you just need a little humor to make it through. I’ve been here off and on for 13 1/2 years, and here’s the list Handsome Husband and I came up with of things we have NEVER said:
- I wish there were less sauce on this pizza.
- (at any hospital in the city) Oh great, look! There’s hand soap in the bathroom.
- I wish the heating was warmer on the upper floors of City Mall (mo er cheng). [I mean, seriously, how does it get so much hotter with each higher floor!]
- I love it when someone smokes in the elevator!
- I’m so glad [insert any government process] was so easy!
- I wish more strangers would touch, pick up, or photograph my children.
- Yes, I would love to buy that product because you broadcasted its features in a megaphone as I walked by in the supermarket
- Just what I was craving…shrimp flavored potato chips. (or durian, or other flavors we find odd)
- In the same vein as the one above, “I’m so glad this is bean paste filling and not chocolate, taro and not blueberry!” [But at least now I’m not surprised by it]
- I’m so glad there are so many housing development flyers stuffed into my bike basket. (Although I have said, “Wow, that old lady has seriously good aim to get all those people whizzing by her.”)
- It’s so convenient that this giant building with 12 doors has exactly one that is unlocked.
- Sure, Mr. Airport Taxi Driver. I’ll pay you 100 RMB to take me into the city.
- I wish I could find an apartment to rent that had more strobe or multi colored lights.
- This hotel’s carpeted flooring is so clean.
- This is the softest mattress I’ve ever slept on!
Leave us a comment with the phrases we’ve left out. Two notable exclusions: the cold weather and the traffic. Reasons for exclusions: it’s not always cold. Summer is coming. And the traffic hasn’t always been this bad, so in my early days I never complained about it.